hi Jesus
i’m suppose to be “joyful”
the church people tell me —
i smile to make them think i am joyful
but you/
and i/
know better …
it’s all about the feeling
of not achieving the things
i have always wanted/
it’s not about lack of food
or money/
i don’t remember the last time i smiled
or laughed
except for someone telling a joke/
i’ll continue to wait
maybe this is my new normal
i’ll sit at home &
eat peanut butter on graham crackers
& drink milk —
makes a good meal, really/
i’m here at the
same place
you know where to find me/
until we talk tonight
as we do 3 hours each night,
i’ll read one of my favorite authors
maybe do some oil painting
and pray for all who come to my
mind who also have needs
( Jim Wortham, September 19, 2022)